Note: The numbers refer to the chakra system. I read the chakras from root, #1, to crown, #7. More information about chakras, where in the body they’re located and what they represent can be found on the FAQ page.
Phone reading, female, age 47
“I’ve never felt safe, I don’t belong.”
Overview: Angst, unease, anxiety marked your childhood. A feeling of not knowing what was going to happen next, where you fit in, anxiety instead of peace and security. This anxiety left you striving to find some kind of answer, some place where you could be at peace, feel accepted and safe. Rejection from a parent, feels like mother. Was she too “busy” for you? She feels like she had a full set of her own problems, and little time or energy to devote to you. This rejection has left you with a deficit in your power, your sense of self and identity. Caretaker/rescuer archetype. Do you tend to “adopt” and rescue others? If so you’re giving what you never got. “Nobody loves me.”
- There is a feeling that you tried, unsuccessfully, to earn love and approval from a parent, again I think it was mother. “I’m not enough, there’s never enough.” Feeling starved for love can feel like being starved for food. Are you overweight?” “I don’t matter, I’m nothing. I must be perfect.” You tried to prove yourself worthy of love but it didn’t help. Sadness and despair. “What’s wrong with me??” (a child’s conclusion.)
- “I don’t matter. I’m a bother.” Do you recall thinking you wish you’d never been born or that you wished you were dead? There is a sadness and wistfulness about having missed out on what other children had, which I assume were loving, attentive parents. “It must be my fault, I must be defective.” Abandonment– where was your father? He feels neutral, not attached to you very much either.
- Shut down. Your identity and personal power has been siphoned off by others most of your life. Do you recognize that you have a pattern of co-dependence, ie. “give until it hurts?” Others have also used you in relationships because you don’t know how to value yourself enough to maintain a healthy balance between giving and receiving. Archetype of the servant. Have you had a lot of jobs where you’re supporting someone else? A lot of obnoxious bosses?
- The heart energy is flat, shut down, and does not trust. Is there someone close to you with an active drug or alcohol addiction? Someone is draining you and it feels like an addict. Do you have a husband or son with this profile? Are you trying to “save” him? The heart says, “What’s the use?”
- Do you tend to “go along to get along?” The voice and will aspect of your personality is suppressed. You don’t want to make waves, so you go along, even if your heart is not in it. One cannot direct their life if they don’t know what they want and have a drive and passion to get it. I don’t see any of that in you at this time, I think you’ve given up trying to get what you really want.
- You tend to take the backseat to others ideas. Your self-confidence was overwritten as a child and you have yet to get it back or define your own identity. The servant is still in charge, trying to people-please to survive.
- Confusion. What are you confused about regarding the Divine? That God sees you, cares about you, wants to hear you? Have you imprinted parental issues onto God as many abused children do? Are you afraid on some level that God will also reject you?